22 July 2012

social commentary Sunday . . . 'where has the blog love gone??'

Greetings all,
Gosh, what has happened to blogging lately??  I've been chatting to some fellow bloggers off line & we've noticed a shift in blog happiness.  There are fewer friendly blog awards around; a decline in comments/ posts/ link ups + the reaction against people monetorising their blogs or scoring a paid gig on a forum group site - geesh, i thought the working mother debate was fierce enough - earning money off your blog is the new 'thing' to attack.
How about we turn it around??  Today!!
I don't care if you started your blog as a personal diary or business pursuit, i'll read when it interests me (& always comment) or if i disagree about something because . . . 
i don't drink alcohol, 
i am a full time mother, 
i don't like coffee, 
i loathe smokers, 
i disagree with junk food, 
i am not religious, 
i don't have depression, 
i still struggle with crochet,
i can't afford to flit off to Europe,
i'm discouraged by swearing, 
i dislike wives complaining about husbands, 
i feel icky about social-media-climbers, 
i can't bare whiners 
& a string of my own personal judgemental/ preference/ health issues . . .
i click away & move on with my life!!  I don't leave some horrendous-bitchy-nasty-hatefilled-personal attack comment!!  If i'm going to disagree with a point of view, i ensure i have a learned reason, it's never 'i disagree & now i hate you' especially on personal blogs.  Those bloggers are baring their souls & reaching out, that is so brave!!  Sure if you're going to venture beyond 'vanilla blogging' as Edenland calls it, you're going to get more than people's 2 cents worth of opinion, but that can still be filled with love & care, why the negativity & vitriol??  
We are real people, with ideas & feelings, putting it out there . . . many bloggers simply disappear into the ether after a heinous comment or attack . . . that is crushing to think some anonymous troll has such power over you & your happy place - so many of us blog as therapy & our blogs are our happy place
 So grab a button or make your own up, let's get blogging back to where it used to be.  Sure i've written posts about competitive blogging & jaded blogging, here, on my own blog with my own opinion, NOT on the blogs of the people who i was generalising about.  Just because you do drink, smoke, eat junk, work, believe in God, swear or whinge, doesn't mean i don't like you blog because you're different to me - one post does not make me judge a blogger!!  
I mention depression as a non blogger asked me "don't you have to have depression or something to complain about as an angle on your blog??"  Ouch, she was corrected, promptly.  I don't have depression nor understand it, however, if blogging helps you, that's wonderful, it's just unlikely i can add a helpful comment to your post about that topic.  Ditto for other issues like special needs children or a physical injury - but hello to my carpal tunnel syndrome readers!!  We have a great sense of community here in blogland.    
I don't care what product you promote in a post & if you're making cash from it . . . good for you.  I personally don't dig the blogs who end up looking like the back-of-magazine-advertising pages filled with flashing ads, they are so distracting & kind of . . . no longer a blog anyway.  But if you do the odd paid post here & there, brilliant, they are informative & the voice of a real person, someone i 'know' & trust.  Most have a reader giveaway - i've won dozens of product giveaway prizes, from simply entering cheerfully. 
If you run a blog off your business, it's very likely i found your business first, then realised there is an ace blog attached.  Tessa from Down That Little Lane is a great example & recently posted on being 'amused by pompous, slaggy abusers' taking it with a grain of salt.  Their loss, as her blog & business are delightful. Tina Gray {dot} Me wrote a beautiful post on forming blog alliances, what a lovely idea for those starting out, or even established bloggers, like a warm blanket.  I would be careful who you pick & reassess, as i've seen informal versions crumble as one blogger has reached great heights (read: income from blogging) much to the jealousy of others in the 'group', guess what, the anonymous negative comments came pouring in.  Blah!!  
Now this is not for journalists & professional writers who write posts to bait comment, indifference & ferocious debate, they're paid to get under our skin & evoke a response.  This is for your fellow, humble, honest, real person blogger.  Who's with me??  Bring back the love & positivity with happiness & support, love Posie

59 comments:

Leonie said...

Oh I totally agree with you!!
There is a definite shift in blog happiness.
I personally love the down to earth, honest blogs where I feel I can relate to the person behind the words.
Those are the blogs that keep me coming back, the real people.
Bring back the blog lovin'!

Mother Down Under said...

I really like this post...and this idea!
I suppose I haven't been blogging for that long so I am not sure about a shift in blog happiness but I am all for friendly awards, link ups and comments!
I agree that most people blog because they enjoy it and because it fulfils them in some way. As a result, bloggers share a lot of their lives and the only way to respond is with positive support!

Jo in TAS said...

Ditto to all of that! I blog because it makes me happy and I leave comments cause that makes me happy too and I obviously have an interest in what has been written. Share the love, I say!

Wendy Sice said...

I've found I really like when bloggers post daily, because there is always something interesting to read or look at. HOWEVER, it is really grating on me that these same bloggers never respond to anyone's comments - ever! I respond to every comment, even though I don't have a huge amount of traffic. Do some bloggers reach a point when they think they don't need to reply because they are celebrities?? I don't want to pick on those bloggers, cause I love their blogs, but I like when there is conversation in the blogging community - like minds and all that. Maybe those younger bloggers just think I'm an old woman ... and with some of them I am twenty or so years older. Anyway, sorry, supposed to be spreading the love and I just vented instead.:)

Sophie Slim said...

Oh Posie! The ever faithful positive Posie.

thank you for sharing and being you.

x

rachelmp said...

Its really interesting! I get a lot less comments and I put it down to not going the social media way and I blog very basic family and crafty content. I think I should comment more as I do read a lot of blogs each day

Lisa - Sweet Little Pretties said...

Great post Posie : ) I haven't been around too long but There should be some more love. I love to leave comments on blogs and love when they take their time to respond. I love to respond and read all my comments.

Becky said...

I had not noticed a formal shift myself, but now that you have mentioned it I find myself nodding in agreement a little.

I have been so busy in the past month that I have not been commenting as much as usual. I will have to make up for that this week.

Aunt Spicy said...

totally agree! and I have noticed a lot of the same things! I read most blogs in googles blogger, which might explain one reason for fewer comments. But when something resonates (like this post) I pop in and add a little support!

lou lou said...

Hi Posie

I Get you here.
I could have written quite a few of those what I don't do's as well.
The way I see it is - yes blogging and commenting has become bitchy in many areas.
I take note of what I see (and I also have a good memory too) for what goes on.

I don't get a lot of time these days for commenting let alone blog writing some days.
But,
I visit who I enjoy, block or avoid what and who I don't.
I have now learnt very well to press the off button or switch off social media when I feel like it and now not feel any guilt or angst over it.
It's my life not theirs.
If you wondered when I went quite for a while….
(your toenails would curl if you knew which Australian Blogger has bullied me online).

have a great day as always Miss Posie :)

Loulou x

ClaireyHewitt said...

Somedays I have nothing to write, or even more so, not time to sit down and get it written. This week two readers have said 'come on, step it up, give us more! '

It was nice to hear that, I really am amazed every time I am told someone has read my blog.

I read lots of blogs, and among that are hundreds that don't interest me, I just keep,clicking!

Coal Valley View said...

Well I can't fathom leaving a negative comment on a Blog. Not nice. If there is a lot of that going around then that's a real shame.

I only started blogging last year so don't have a long history to compare to but I did find it interesting that when I received and then passed on a Blog Award to 5 people, only 2 of the 5 forwarded it on to others.

Posie, you ALWAYS leave the nicest positive comments so I hope no one is leaving you negative comments! I love it when people respond to the comments I leave either directly or by visiting my blog and these are the bloggers I feel closest too. I like leaving comments on posts I like but if I never hear back from a blogger in some form then I won't leave comments anymore even though I might still read their blogs. On that note, I'm guilty these last couple of weeks of not commenting like I usually do due to being away and then busy so here I am tonight catching up on all my favourite blogs and showing some Blog Lovin'. Mel xx

Coal Valley View said...

Well I can't fathom leaving a negative comment on a Blog. Not nice. If there is a lot of that going around then that's a real shame.

I only started blogging last year so don't have a long history to compare to but I did find it interesting that when I received and then passed on a Blog Award to 5 people, only 2 of the 5 forwarded it on to others.

Posie, you ALWAYS leave the nicest positive comments so I hope no one is leaving you negative comments! I love it when people respond to the comments I leave either directly or by visiting my blog and these are the bloggers I feel closest too. I like leaving comments on posts I like but if I never hear back from a blogger in some form then I won't leave comments anymore even though I might still read their blogs. On that note, I'm guilty these last couple of weeks of not commenting like I usually do due to being away and then busy so here I am tonight catching up on all my favourite blogs and showing some Blog Lovin'. Mel xx

Seaweed and Raine said...

There isn't time in a day some days to read every post in my reader. With this in mind, I pick my way through the plethora of posts to read the ones that "speak" to me that particular day. I do try to comment on the posts that interest me though.
I have wondered where everyone seems to have gone. I hope there is a change of heart out there - the blogging world was one full of encouraging people when I started out 2 years ago.

Lisar said...

I have the attitude that if you can't think of anything nice to say, then don't say anything....I love reading blogs and enjoy posting onto mine....I don't get many comments on mine, but mainly blog so that oversease family and friends can see what I have been up to....thanks for your entertaining posts and for keeping it real!!!

deux chiens et un garcon said...

Love ya, missed ya and hope to be around more
xx

Jode said...

Oh Posie...i do so love your posts!!!Goodness, didn't realise the blog lovin was in a decline...what a sad state of affairs!I give honesty in my posts and expect honesty in any comments i receive but a little loving too!!!When it comes down to it though i am always in awe that anyone has found the time in their day to drop by my blog for a visit and appreciate that and hopefully send it back in return!
Thanks for giving out some love and speaking with honesty xxx

m.e (Cathie) said...

hello Miss Posie,
I totally agree with this post.
I felt the blog love disappear and that's why i took a break from it.
i will be back, but only when I feel like it.
Blogging is all about doing something you love, if it's not there then the whole blogging thing needs to be re evaluated.
stay happy ♥

Jan-Maree said...

Funny how many of your "I don't like" preferences I agree with. That is probably why I have always enjoyed reading your blog so much. My mum always said' if you can't say something nice, don't say anything". I don't think that means that you can't disagree but you need to find a polite, courteous way to say it or don't say it - nasty bitchy comments are so not necessary. I respond to all the comments I receive as I feel if someone has taken the time to comment they deserve a response. To me it is part of building a relationship with those that read my blog and many of them have become friends. A little more love and support among bloggers can only be a good thing! Good post Posie!

A Spoonful Of Sugar said...

Great post as always Jennie! I think that the love is still around - just that bloggers are more likely to "like" a post in facebook or read in google reader, rather than visiting the blog and leaving comments. It used to take me 2+ hours per day to answer all my comments and visit the blogs of those who had left them. Once I started hanging out on facebook, twitter, and pinterest, there just wasn't enough hours in the day to comment as much. I do miss the friendly emails and relationships made through the comments. Not sure what the answer is?

TexWisGirl said...

i don't allow anonymous comments on my place - solves a lot right there. but i also don't opine much. mostly just try to share the beauty i have around me w/ a spot of humor and reality now and again. but that's just me and my blogging niche.

Little Black Footprints said...

I was brought up that if you have got nothing nice to say then don't say it and I have always stuck by that.It's still early days for me and am only just getting around other peoples blogs and have been fortunate enough not to have any of this anti blogness. I love your honesty, you seem a great strong person and I love the way you write and you will never get a bad comment from me no one will so if you don't mind I will be popping in from time to time x

A-M said...

'I still struggle with crochet'.... You crack me up! Great post! The blogging universe has changed so much since I arrived in it 5 years ago. It's funny, we seemed to have so much more time back then! ... And we commented and commented! The blog world is growing so fast, it is almost impossible to keep up with everyone now. I struggle to find the time to comment, not just on my blog and friend's blogs but in reply to emails coming from my dear readers. I have found that I do receive more emails these days than comments which poses a challenge itself... 375 emails x 10 minutes to reply to each one....stress inducing. But the friendships made make up for all the challenges! What a pity I didn't know you were at Blogopolis! I would have loved to meet you! You would have to be the sunniest, most positive blogger I know! A-M xx

Claire said...

Hey Jennie a very thought provoking post....... I can't say I have noticed the decline in blog love, maybe we move in different blog circles? I'm with you on the all dancing, all singing, lights flashing blogs. I turn off pretty quickly and move onto the next. I comment regularly and try to visit new blogs and say 'hi'. Knowing how much I love hearing from people, I make the effort to comment even if only a line or two. I reply to comments and let people know how much I appreciated them taking time to say 'hi' TIme is precious. It is time consuming but I joined the blog world to meet people and connect so it's worth it. Great friendships have been forged. I have found that if you want more visitors to your blog and comments then you have to get out there visit others and say 'hi'.
I made my blog 'award free'. At first I was flattered about being given them, but they go round and round and while it's nice to be in the spotlight I would prefer not to have to do a post about them and then try and choose other blogs to forward them too. Am more than happy to give a shout out to blogs I am enjoying and let others know through a regular post.

I was in Canberra weekend before last, you have a great choice of Op shops there..........

Claire :}

Sarah B said...

Hi Posie, I started blogging for me and I love the connections I have made with some lovely ladies. I don't understand why anyone would be negative - it just doesn't make sense to me! I have said it before, I'm not that interested in being biger than Benhur but so so value when people take the time to drop by and say hello. I make sure to return the favour. It shouldn't be so difficult, bit like being in High School with a bunch of snappy teenage girls at times! We don't need that.
Have a lovely week xx

Hot Fudge said...

Well said Miss Posie. I've never left adverse comments on anyone's blog, although I have to admit that at times I've been mighty tempted. It's not that I'm wishy-washy or don't have strong opinions, it's just that I don't want to ruin anyone's day. Much easier to walk away.

Posie Patchwork said...

Thanks ladies, your feedback is incredible. What a nice bunch of bloggers you are, you've made my week!! Love Posie

ally said...

Hi Jennie
I always enjoy your social commentary posts...so much to think about.
I would never leave a negative comment...and wouldn't do that in real life either. I choose to not read..to walk away.
And I think we'd all love some more bloggy love
xx

alison@thisbloominglife said...

Enjoy the return to school today...as I read this I kept humming the song 'you are my sunshine'. You, (and the blogs I read) are my bits of sunshine in the day...I have no time for small little people cutting down tall poppies! Thanks Posie

Bree said...

Hey lovey. I definitely think blog land has moods just like we all do. Sometimes there's heaps going on and sometimes not. Sometimes lots of comments and some not. But there's never an excuse for rudeness. I try to leave comments as often as I can to share the love around cause I know how nice it is to get them back. And I always reply even if just to say thanks ( if there's a valid email of course)

Belle Inspirations said...

Great honest post!I agree let's bring back the Love! Have a beautiful day posie xx

Sally said...

A fabulously honest and to the point post again Jenni.

Wouldn't life be so boring if we were all the same. Diversity and difference is something to relish - not a reason to hate.

I'm feeling the love (from my sick bed - boo hoo!)

Anonymous said...

Don't mind admitting I rarely comment on blogs, but I totally agree there's no need to read something if you don't like it.
Nasty troll type behaviour is just bullying by another name.
Support the positivity I say. And if you can monetize your blog then good luck and go for it! It's just not realistic to expect free entertainment and hours of writing from bloggers with no commerciality.
Keep writing, I admire your honesty.
Canberra Mummy x

littlebitofthyme.com said...

totally agree! I think bloggers shouldn't feel the need to publish crappy comments. Thankfully what we all post is all our own opinion.

Tanya said...

Well said! I'm not a blogger (yet..) but I do follow a number of blogs that I enjoy - and some that often cause me to pause and reflect on my own values and opinion. Sometimes, they even cause me to change it....
But I have noticed a steady incline in the amount of negative (and sometimes down right abusive) comments cropping up. I don't understand the need to attack someone's opinion - especially when you can just stop reading if you disagree!

Tania said...

You always give such great food for thought type of posts. Though I hadn't really noticed there was a big shift, that may be because I greatly reduced the amount of blogs I was reading. Perhaps in a subconscious way avoiding those that I felt drained me. So what you say is probably very true. I like your positive spin on it all and what a great banner that is for "real bloggers".

emma @ frog, goose and bear said...

Thankfully my space has remained my happy space, although sometimes I do get a little over myself and I do struggle to find the time to blog. I try not to put the pressure on myself as there are enough pressures and more urgent requirements offline to deal with without adding more. I'm with you on all the other social media stuff too. facebook and blogging is all I can manage, although I am slightly addicted to pinterest.... purely for the collecting of kids craft and party ideas!!! I agree, if you can't say anything nice - move on. Don't waste your time being nasty/negative - not helpful to anyone! Thanks for the reminder to be nice!

Nat - Muddy Farmwife said...

I love your Sunday Social Commentary, you always give me food for thought!
I have been guilty this last month of not replying to comments on my blog and have felt guilty for it, if people make the effort to comment then it's nice to get a response, I know I like it when I comment. I have also missed being able to comment on other blogs, to let people know I'm reading.
I haven't been subject to nasty comments but have seen some and can't understand why people would write them. If you don't like it, the choice is yours to click away, not to judge.
Thanks for making us think Posie.

Tania McCartney said...

SO with you, my lovely friend. I won't waste a minute on any blog that riles me and would NEVER leave comment. Trolls are no-hoper weirdos but nasty comments - through envy, disillusion or through bastardising your content or words - can be crushing, whether they're trolls or the worst of the worst: anonymous commentary - the epitome of weak weak weak.

I love your thoughts on forming blogging alliances. In the children's book world, the alliances are strong, pure and supportive. I remember when blogging use to be the same. I'm now at a point where blogging is only a small and occasional part of what I do - it used to be so much more, but so many have spoiled it and I rarely visit more than a handful of favourite blogs now.

Great post, Posie. To blog haters - Get a Life - and live and let live!

Amanda said...

Hi Posie, great post, and maybe a few people need a bit of a shake. I don't get a lot of comments on my post and don't have a huge following but that is ok i'm over worrying if anyone is out there actually reading my stuff. As long as a few buy my patterns now and again I am happy. I get a kick when I am somewhere and someone says hey i read your blog, (usually at a quilting retreat or fabric sale like a couple of weeks ago). But I was always bought up with the philosophy of if you can't say something nice keep your mouth shut and that goes down for comments as well. There are a few blogs that I have just gone I don't need this crap any longer and so I don't visit them any more but I don't need to broadcast it to the world.

Mikaela said...

Well said lady xo

Miss Prudence said...

Good on you Jennie - people are allowed to blog what they want to blog. There are a few "questionable" blogs (in my little view) out there, but I as you say, "click away" - none the less, there is a courage about these posts of personal info - i thought blogs, no I think blogs ARE about being able to share and learn from each other. I learn cleaning tips, struggling tips, how to tips - I make friends. I have never had any abusive posts but I did cop and email once and frankly it didn't bother me at all...she has since left some pretty nice comments..I love supporting bloggers, especially new bloggers.

Yeah grab me a badge! Bring on the loving!

Tania McCartney said...

Just wanted to say, as other bloggers have also noted here, I've noticed a marked decrease in comments this past year but I honestly don't think we need to take this to heart - it's not reflective of content. My enormously popular Kids Book Review site achieves as many as 55,000 hits a month and we get between 3 and 10 comments a MONTH, so comments do NOT a blog make.

Also, people are just busy and there are SO MANY blogs to visit and comment on. Hits are just now more evenly spread.

On Wendy's comment about not replying to comments on blogs - I take absolutely no offense whatsoever if people don't respond to my comments - in fact, I don't expect it in the least - and I find it just as irritating when every single comment is commented on by the blogger.

It's just interesting to note everyone is different and this is why, I think, blog attacks happen... that people presume and judge others so easily. I don't reply to some comments on my blog because I don't think the comment needs it - no other reason. I'm sure most people who don't reply to every comment don't in the least bit think they're of celebrity status - I certainly don't! :)

Blog love!

The Humming Cat said...

I can't crochet either...whats with that??

Red Parka Diaries said...

Great post! And I also loved reading through the comments...I still consider myself a fairly new blogger and am only just really starting to get involved in the blogging community. It seems silly to me now but in the beginning I was so nervous about commenting. I was nervous about blogging in general! But now I've found my feet I love it and I'm enjoying getting more involved.
Yay for blog love!!

The Accidental Housewife said...

Aww, Posie, the more I learn about you the more I like you! I could tick that list off myself. We're really going to have to catch up one of these days...

Lilli boo said...

Yay Posie, another great 'post' I love your take on your blogging and agree with you 98% ( I have to reserve 2% as I like drinking wine and I drink coffee!)..:-)
Otherwise I am finding I am going back to reading blogs as I love hearing people's voices irrespective of their circumstances and I like the honesty approach and the day to day insights. Thank you for your insightful read as usual...one of the many reasons I keep coming back...x

CraftyMummy said...

Hear, Hear! Bring back the lovely bloggers!

Great post, Lovely Blogger :D

Jane said...

You know I'm right behind you, Jennie. 100%. J x

Wendy B said...

here here!!! You said it loud and proud and that's the way we like it! You go girl!!! xo

Cherry Blossom said...

Totally agree. If my blog ever gets bigger there will be no room for any unwelcome comments.

Tessa White said...

Couldn't agree more, it old fashioned as such but nothing good to say? keep quiet maybe?

I should comment more often as I read so many and often potter off without saying hi.. time poor but no excuse x

NessaKnits said...

Sometimes my real life gets in the way! But I still pop in from time to time to make sure the handsome husband is well and in Australia and what your opinion is on various things happening in the world. If people want to make a profit from their blog, so be it ...

IndigoElephant :: Sash said...

Love this post... thanks for putting it out there!

Tina ~ Tina Gray {dot} Me said...

Love this post. Well said, Posie! Sorry it took me so long to pop on over. I only just realised that you had linked to me. xx

Linda said...

great post Jen. I have felt a real change in blogging for quite a while. I have been ill for quite a few years but my blog kept me sane, inspired to sew through the pain and was my link to like minded peeps. Over the last 6 months or so I pretty much stopped blogging, I have lost my blog mojo 'cos I felt I was talking to myself. I hadn't been well enough to visit blogs often, I was hardly even on the computer and that is still the case. If I was on Facebook which I started to keep in touch with family in QLD and WA really it seemed all the bloggers were there chatting and I didn't have energy or desire to do that. I have kept my blog in case my mojo returns. I have done a few recent posts for my own record really. I think FB and Twitter have ruined the blog love how it used to be, I start chemo infusions this Friday so I won't be blogging anytime soon but I hope to start visiting my faves again, it's just sad that if you are too unwell to visit you don't get visits back and also there is bitchiness, it is crap people do that. My blog is over 6yo now so I will keep it for later when I feel like loving it again. Another thing is too, there is a blog that started not long after mine and became very big and for years I commented 'cos I loved the blog but never got one comment back in years, that sucks, needless to say I haven't gone there in ages, I hope the BLOG LOVIN returns!!!hugs to you Jen you are a gem xxxxxx

Cherie @ raising master Max said...

Posie Posie Posie ...

You are just BRILLIANT!

What did happen to that friendly old blogosphere?

I just click away from anything hate filled, & pour myself into the abundance of positivity & inspiration I gain from blog writing, & reading.

I've found my perfect set up now :)

I protect any deeply personal posts with a password for readers I know from my previous blog :) & I moderate all comments now.

I just won't post any nasty comments now :)

As for your values, we are much the same. And yet, I read & LOVE some blogs who do swear a lot, are deeply religious etc. etc.

We don't all have to be the same to get along :)

You're a wonderful person to have in this sphere' x

Nikki @ Styling You said...

Posie, forgive me for only getting your post now. Thanks for linking up. I'm with you all the way. Blogging love makes the world go round - we don't have to agree with everything we come across but we can click and move on or leave a constructive non-anon message. x

Jennifer mysentimentaljamboree said...

Hi Posie,
I have been going through your blog whenever I get a moment. Although I'm a very new blogger, I especially LOVE this post! You are so lovely and I'm glad I have found your blog and can follow along with your everyday! Thanks for sharing. You're a star!
Love Jen